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Who to vote for online quiz

OK. So I recently linked to this online quiz about who to vote for. In the spirit of intellectual transparency, here are my answer (w/ brief explanations).

1. Your neighbor brings over some brownies that she proudly made with tofu. Your reaction?
   

   "Nice. Here's some flax seed muffins in return."
   "The soybeans used weren't GMO... right?"
   "Interesting... what will you pay me for taste testing these?"
   "You look anemic. Can I buy you a steak?"
   "Is that like kung-fu?"

   Answer: I don't have flax seed muffins; I don't care if soybeans are GMO or not; I wouldn't offer to buy my vegan friends a steak; I do know what tofu is. But tofu brownies don't sound appealing.

2. Social security:
   

   Is for old people.
   Is a good way to take care of retired people
   Is a drain on your paycheck
   Is solid - a time honored government program
   Won't be around when you need it

   Answer: I know it's not just for old people; there are better ways to plan for retirement; it isn't much of a drain on my checkbook (I choose not to contribute to it, an IRS option); I don't think it's solid.

3. There's been another terrorist attack, and the internet is too slow to get news. You tune into:

   Fox News
   Your local NPR station
   CNN
   MTV
   Whatever comes in down in your bomb shelter

   Answer: I'd rather choose "internet". But. I find NPR generally boring; FOX leans right, CNN leans left; MTV is a joke; I don't own a bomb shelter.

4. Gun control:
   

   Prevents crime
   Means hiding your missles from the Feds
   Is essential for video games
   Is a steady hand
   Hasn't gone far enough - not even close

   Answer: It doesn't prevent crime; it doesn't mean hiding missiles; it's not a steady hand (or using both); and I support the Constitution. But I find it useful to get good weapons/ammo when playing Call of Duty.

5. Your nephew is born with cerebral palsy. You:
   

   Become a lawyer so that you can sue the doctor
   Turn him into a national celebrity, complete with a Cafepress site
   Try to get his parents to sue the doctor
   Feel sad and don't like to think about it
   Try extra hard to help him gain motor skills

   Answer: Why would I sue? Why would I turn him into a celebrity? Why would I just feel sad about it & do nothing?

6. Death penalty:

   Is used way too often - you're not even sure you're for it
   You're for it, in certain cases
   Only for people who cut you off in traffic
   Like Amnesty International, you're against it in all cases
   Is something you'd prefer to carry out against those who harm you

   Answer: Road rage is stupid; nothing is always wrong/right; I recognize the state's right to defend its citizens.

7. Who annoys you most?

   John Ashcroft
   Ann Coulter
   Bill Gates
   Michael Moore
   Your Mom

   Answer: Except for my mom (who only annoys me sometimes), they all frequently annoy me on different levels. But you'll pry my Apple PowerBook from my cold dead fingers.

8. When it comes to fighting terrorism, you'd rather:
   

   Get out of Iraq... NOW!
   Seek the UN's support before doing anything
   Fight anyone who attacks *you* but not give a penny to the war
   Attack first before they attack us
   Move to New Zealand and hope for the best

   Answer: My position on Iraq is well known; the UN is a joke; I've no interest in moving to New Zealand; and supporting personal self-defense but not state-defense seems logically inconsistent.

9. You're most likely to read:
   

   Reason Magazine
   People
   Business Wee
   Utne Reader
   Street Signs

   Answer: I do read street signs but that's not the point. I don't own a business or stocks; I don't care about celebrities. And while I do like Utne Reader often enough, Reason is actually one of my favorite magazines.

10. As for gay marraige:
    

    Dude - it's totally gay
    You're for it (or at least for civil unions)
    The government should not be involved with marriage
    You're against it - and not too hot on civil unions either
    It should be legal ... and gays should be protected against discrimination

    Answer: The "civil union" thing is a cop-out; discrimination is bad; it should be legal. But. More importantly. The state should be involved in marriage only to the extent of enforcing property contracts, not morals/ethics/emotions/theology.

11. Did you ever call "french fries" "freedom fries"?
    

    No, you just stuffed them in your mouth.
    Yes (even if you were joking)
    There's no such thing as a free french fry
    Hell no!
    Only when you give them away to homeless people

    Answer: French fries are a culinary, not a political object (plus I'm not an existentialist).

    Posted by Miguel at 05:04 PM

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